The best men can be.
So, Gillette came up with an advertisement with the intentions of making us better men. It was gender-oriented and asked us, men, to hold other men accountable for their actions. A great move and a beautiful video. But the comments section was flooded with hurt egos of toxic masculinity. Terribly Tiny Tales brought this to my attention, and I’m bringing it to yours. (I’ve never done this before, but I’ll embed the advertisement at the very end of this post. Do watch.)
Can I tell you some stories?
I had a friend named Akbar. We were best friends when I was in fifth grade and he told me about all kinds of things that happened in his life. He was five years older to me. One day, he told me about how his father beat his mother black and blue. Akbar cried as he told me about his mother’s bruised elbows but we didn’t talk for too long about it. I met his mother a week after that and she wore full sleeves all day. Akbar trusted me with his stories and I trusted him when he said he would become a real man. When he told me about his father, he made me promise that I won’t become a coward like his father.
In ninth grade, I had a major crush on a girl. The first chat we had, she told me about the time she was harassed. My mother and sister told me about their stories too, when I was young. I was never raised in a bubble.
But if you feel the need to join the front lines of this battle of good humans against “not all men” shouters uninvited and clarify that you’re not at the wrong side of the war, then you probably were raised in a bubble. I know myself to be a good human and I believe you have good inside you, too. But I do have a few questions.
Why do you feel the need to comment ‘not all men!’ on videos made to raise awareness for sexual harassment or toxic masculinity? Why do you feel the need to fight back when your friend who did wrong is called out? Screw you.
Real men don’t hide in ‘read more comments..’ tags with defensive words. They don’t wear banners of ‘not all men’ and ‘I am a man’ and they don’t laugh when their friends catcall a woman. They don’t bully other men, kids or women and they certainly don’t wear masks of confidence to hide their flaws. They accept others. They correct themselves.
Yes, all men. All men have to be held accountable for their actions by other men and women if they’re in the wrong.
It’s not very tough to become a nice person. Please try.